LIFE AT TERRELL
Imagine living 23 hours each day in a cell 6 feet
by 10 feet. Now imagine that the floor, walls, and
ceiling are all concrete with only one window which
is approximately 6 inches by 48 inches. Imagine
that your door is solid steel except for two small
openings 6 inches by 24 inches, and they are
covered by wire so that only the fingers can be
stuck through to the outside.
Imagine that there is no television and no air
conditioning. You are cooled by a system called
tempered air, which uses water to cool the air. If
you do not have family or friends to support you
with money you can't afford to purchase a fan
or radio so you sit in the Texas heat and try to
pass the hours reading, sleeping, or talking to
your neighbor. Of course you can barely hear your
neighbor because the noise echoes due to the design
of the building and because you have to yell to be
heard. When many others are trying to talk to their
friends by yelling the noise is deafening. None of
this is imagined, but reality. Life on death row at
Terrell Unit in Livingston, Texas is one of almost
complete isolation with only the guards, someone
from the infirmary, or an occasional Chaplain to
come by and break the boredom. Think about never
feeling the touch of a caring human, never feeling
the touch of a kind arm around your shoulder for
encouragement. The only human contact is when a
guard grabs your wrist to cuff you or uncuff you.
Think about having to see your family and loved
ones through a glass window and longing to hold
your child or hug your wife. Your mind brings sweet
thoughts of past moments of tenderness and then
your mind jerks you down into a living hell knowing
that you will never experience these things again.
For those who have stood outside the cell doors in
the heat with perspiration streaming down their
face and back they know all to well the suffering
of those who are locked away from society. For
those who have listened to men who have given up
hope and are thinking of dropping their appeals
they know the depths of despair and depression.
Society may say that killing by lethal injection is
punishment, but society is WRONG. For most, dying
is an escape, a relief from the harsh life of day
to day survival. Of trying to encourage yourself
against overwhelming odds. Death is not feared by
most on death row because it is the door to a
better life. A life where they will be loved and in
the presence of God. For those who have not become
a Christian death holds no fear as they have
personally experienced it. If society truly wants
to exact punishment they would abolish the death
penalty tomorrow and sentence men to life in prison
without parole. No, society does not want justice
or punishment, they want revenge. And the more
cruel and inhumane the conditions, the better they
like it.
Those who judge harshly would do well to remember
that they too will one day stand in judgment. Sin
is sin and a murderer is no more guilty than a liar
or cheat. Does not Scripture teach us that with
whatever judgment we judge others, we ourselves
will be judged.
I don't know about you but I prefer to show mercy and compassion so I can stand and ask for mercy and compassion on that day of judgment.
Benjamin David